Forgive Me
by Daydream7
Summary: Ronnie/Danielle. Another route they could have taken with the R&D storyline. Takes place after Danielle returns from Telford after her abortion. Please R
1. Chapter 1

**A/N:- Hey :) This is just a short Ronnie and Danielle story, just a few chapters long I think. It's based around the song 'Forgive Me' by Evanescence, which will run throughout :P **

**It's not based around the wedding night, just another way that their story could have played out :) It's based around the time following the weeks after Danielle's abortion, just to give you a sort of idea of the timeline :P **

**Don't really know where this came from, or if anyone is interested in reading, so let me know if you want more after this chapter :D**

_Can you forgive me again?_

_I don't know what I said_

_But I didn't mean to hurt you_

Blinding music pumped through the club, dozens of bodies jumping up and down on the dance floor, the party in full swing at R n R. The younger residents of Albert Square were out in full force, partying and having a good time, jumping along with the music. All but one shy blonde nineteen year old girl, who had much bigger issues to be dealing with than worrying about having a good time. Danielle Jones sat at a table in one of the far corners of the club, watching absent-mindedly as Stacey danced flirtatiously with a guy she barely knew.

Danielle bit her lip, wondering if she could maybe just slip away when the next song came one and Stacey was distracted. She really was not in the party mood, not after just returning from Telford after a big fight with her Dad, and not so soon after she had had the abortion. She tucked her hair behind her ears, feeling sick as she thought of it. Her eyes skirted to the side nervously, searching through the mass of people for Ronnie, but failing. She was scared of coming face to face with her mother again, especially after the way they had left things.

Danielle had been so sure that when Ronnie came to the second abortion appointment it would change everything. She had been so sure that she would have been able to tell Ronnie that she was her daughter, and everything would've been fine. Now Ronnie had hurt her so badly again, and she didn't know if she could face bumping into her. She didn't know if she could ever face her mum again. Not now, knowing that Ronnie's life would've have been better if it weren't for her, Danielle. She sniffed, a tiny tear appearing at the corner of her eye, and she brushed it away, the moment going unnoticed in the busy club.

Over at the bar, Ronnie was drowning in orders, besieged by the crowd as they jostled on the other side of the bar, hollering drunkenly over the pounding tunes what drink they wanted. As she rushed about she could feel herself starting to sweat from the exertion, and Ronnie wasn't an un-fit person. She checked her watch briefly, sighing as she saw it was past midnight, and the crowd showed no signs of dispersing any time soon. It looked like it was going to be a long night.

She pulled another drink, passing it over the bar and accepting the money which was pressed into her palm. After several more minutes of hectic serving, the queue died down a little, and Ronnie took the moment to pour herself a drink, downing the shot in seconds, her only drink of that night so far. She wiped her mouth as she sat the glass down, sliding past the bartender, trying to make her way to the office, to tell Jack to get his lazy backside out and help her, when she felt a hand tap her shoulder. She spun around, coming face to face with a flustered looking Dawn.

"What?!" she demanded, shouting over the music. Dawn dithered, looking nervous at the bad mood Ronnie was in. She leaned over nonetheless, and called into Ronnie's ear. "Ronnie – look, I know we're busy – but is there any chance I could get away just now?" she looked at her boss pleadingly. "I've left Darren babysitting Summer and he's just called me – she's woken up and is really upset, keeps asking for mummy –" Dawn was in the midst of rolling her eyes before Ronnie cut across her.

"Yeah, fine, go!" she shouted above the blaring tunes. Dawn looked at her in surprise. "Really? I'll make up the time I swear –" she said, feeling shocked that Ronnie had given in so easily, especially since they were so busy.

Ronnie just shook her head at Dawn's wards, shooing her in dismissal. "It's fine, Dawn, go, you can make up the hours some other time, it's OK" she told her, watching as Dawn walked away from her quickly after shooting her a quick grateful smile, taking her chance before Ronnie could change her mind.

Ronnie felt the dull ache swell in her chest, a surge of jealousy flowing through her. She would give anything to swap places with Dawn, be able to leave the club tonight and go home to a little girl who would call her mummy, be able to hold her daughter in her arms. The pain and longing was so great, Ronnie stared after Dawn's retreating figure with misty eyes, until a new group of dancers blocked her from view and Ronnie turned and made her way toward the office again, all traces of emotion firmly locked away once more.

She edged open the door, and walked inside. "Jack will you get out there and…" her angry voice dwindled away into silence as she was confronted by the empty room. She frowned, walking over to Jack's desk, as she saw a post-it note stuck on top of a stack of documents.

_Ronnie – Sorry for leaving you in the lurch, but would you do me a favour and complete this paperwork. I promised I would look after Amy tonight – sorry. I'll make up the time another night. Jack_

As she read the note anger seared through her like a red-hot iron, how dare he leave her without a word? She seethed to herself, scrunching the note up and tossing it into the far corner of the room. Screw him and his paperwork, she thought to herself, swearing furiously under her breath. She strode over to her own desk, opposite Jack's and leaned on the side for a moment, covering her eyes with a shaky hand as she felt a sense of weariness come over her. What was the point in anything anymore? She wondered to herself. Her baby, her darling little baby Amy, was dead, cold and buried somewhere, Ronnie's whole reason for living buried with her. It took all she could to just drag herself out of bed some days, because what was the point? Especially with Jack acting like he was a contender for world's greatest prick, going off to see the little girl that was supposed to be hers. She exhaled slowly, in an attempt to calm herself down.

Then there was of course that strange girl that had come for help a couple of weeks ago. Danielle. Stacey's shy friend who was always hanging around. She hadn't seen the girl since the two weeks gone by since the abortion. Ronnie let out a frustrated sigh, reaching up a hand to clasp it around her locket, feeling the weight of the world on her shoulders. She breathed out slowly, then put her head up, striding back out into the club, any sign of of weakness of pain cleverly hidden behind her icy mask.

As the DJ changed track, Stacey found herself slipping further into the crowd, out of sight from Danielle. Spying her chance, Danielle made to get out of her seat but found her path blocked by a guy who came toward the table, two drinks in his hand. She tried to skirt around him but he stood unmoving, so she finally looked up into his eyes.

"Hey" he smiled, his eyes twinkling. "I'm Aiden" he sat down on the seat next to her, forcing her to slide up to give him a space. He offered one of the drinks to her. "Thought you looked like you were in need of some company. What's your name?" he asked, taking a sip of his own drink.

Danielle looked at the slightly older guy in shock, amazed by his attractiveness and total over-confidence. "D-Danielle" she stuttered hopelessly, shifting uncomfortably, and not taking the drink which he had placed in front of her.

"So Danielle. Nice name" he winked, making her blush like a schoolgirl. "You look kina lonely. What's up? Pretty girl like you doesn't look like she should be miserable, sitting on her own. What happened, boyfriend not turn up?" he asked cheekily, leaning toward her slightly.

"Oh no, I've not got a boyfriend" Danielle found herself saying, cursing mentally as she saw his grin widen.

"Great" he said, shifting closer. "Fancy a dance?" he cocked his head.

Danielle shook her head. "I'm fine, thanks" she said awkwardly, flattered and altogether unnerved by the attention he was paying her. All she wanted and felt like was to get out of the club before Stacey or Ronnie saw her again. She was flattered by his advances, and feeling a little swept up in it all, but she knew that he was just out for one thing, if there was something being with Paul had taught her, it was that.

She had just got out of one mess, and dealing with the repercussions of it, she didn't need another problem. She edged away from him, feeling herself pressed up against the back of the seat in her attempt to make her escape.

"C'mon, Danielle" he said, leaning in close to her face, till she could feel his hot uncomfortable breath on her ear. "Hey!" she protested, trying to shift away from him, as he snaked a hand around her waist, pulling her closer to him.

He tightened his grip slightly, whispering into her ear. "C'mon, why you playing hard to get? From what I hear, you're easy" his voice was throaty and horrible in her ear, and she squeaked, twisting around in his hold, using both of her hands to shove uselessly against his chest. Tears filled her eyes, as Aiden slid his hand up her leg and squeezed her thigh, sending a surge of outrage through her. How dare this guy come up to her and think that he could take advantage? How dare Paul, how dare Ronnie, how dare them _all _for making a fool of her and treating her like dirt. With a dry sob, and a powerful rush of new found rage and strength, Danielle put all her might into one massive shove, sending him leaning back and crashing into the table, all the drinks crashing onto the floor. Danielle pushed her way upwards, angry tears dribbling down her face, as she heard Aiden swear and curse at her, only vaguely seeing him covered in drinks, as she tried to make her way through the crowd.

Several heads had turned toward them, and a general chorus of 'ooh!' went round the guys, while the girls laughed, all taunting and laughing. Danielle pushed her way blindly past all of them, praying to god that she wouldn't encounter Ronnie, before stopping short as she saw Paul, in his work clothes, stare at her in disgust. It was the look from him that finally did it, and she burst into sobs, starting to run toward the exit, barely aware of where she was going.

As she tried to run through the small crowd that had gathered, she barely registered as she crashed clumsily into people. As she forced her way through the crowd, tears blurring her vision, she careened straight into Ronnie, and for a moment, Ronnie's arms went around her, trying to possibly soften the blow, before her arms released her, sending Danielle wobbling to land on her backside. A chorus of laughter rang around the onlookers that had noticed, and Danielle looked up at Ronnie, blushing furiously, shocked, before trying to scramble to her feet.

Ronnie looked down in shock at Danielle, who had tears pouring down her cheeks. "For God's sake! Watch it!" the words burst from her mouth in an immediate angry reaction, before turning to confusion at Danielle's distress. "Danielle? What's wrong did I hurt you?" Ronnie's voice called over the music in concern for the girl, feeling an urge to protect the youngster. As Danielle looked over her shoulder, Ronnie followed her gaze as she saw Paul and a young guy Ronnie didn't recognize, staring at Danielle angrily, the guy she didn't know covered in drinks. "What's going-" she started before Danielle turned to look at her with blazing eyes, and bursting once more into sobs, pushed angrily passed her mother, and ran toward the stairs, leaving Ronnie helplessly calling after her, deeply confused.

**So, how is it? Let me know if you want me to continue, I'll try my best to make it at least a bit more original lol :P **

**xxx**


	2. Chapter 2

**Thanks for the positive feedback so far, not sure exactly how long this will go on, or where exactly I'll take it, as I started it when it just popped into my head lol. Anyway, thanks for the great reviews :D **

**x**

Ronnie stared bewildered after Danielle, who had charged out of sight. Why had Danielle looked at her like that? Her eyes had been filled with such hurt, hostility…Surely she couldn't be that upset that Ronnie had failed to attend the second appointment at the clinic with her. She couldn't fathom out what had happened, why Danielle had been in such a rush, or why one of her staff had looked so angry at the young girl. She gave Paul a strange look, and walked over to him.

"What's going on?" she asked over the music, drawing Aiden a look, narrowing her eyes. Paul looked flustered, "Nothing, Ronnie, honest, it's that Danielle she just flipped, I saw her –" he faltered as his boss silenced him with a look.

"That's enough!" Ronnie snapped, waving her hands. "Get back to work" she snapped at him brusquely, bristling at the derogatory way he had spoken about Danielle, some unknown feeling inside of her, jumping immediately to the young girl's defense.

Paul walked away, and she watched as Aiden made his way out of the club, grumbling and swearing to himself. She stood with her hands on her hips, looking around at the club, everyone dancing away again like absolutely nothing had happened. She saw the bar staff looking overwhelmed as a quick surge of customers made their way forward, but she didn't make a move to follow them. All she could think of was Danielle, and that angry, crushed look she had given her. Like Ronnie had…betrayed her. But that was ridiculous, Ronnie hadn't done anything wrong. But if that was the case, why one earth was she feeling so guilty?

She felt a hand tap her shoulder, disturbing her, and she spun around, ready to snap at anyone who needed it, to vent her frustration but stopped short as she saw Stacey standing in front of her with a look of disgust and stubbornness on her face, she wasn't happy that she was having to interact with Ronnie, she had never liked the icy blonde.

Ronnie seemed to bite back a remark reluctantly, if there was anyone who could go toe-to-toe with Ronnie Mitchell and come out the other side with their dignity intact it was Stacey Slater. Both strong-willed, stubborn, independent, they were probably more alike than either of them knew, or would ever dare to admit.

"You seen Dan?!" Stacey demanded, hands on her hips. One minute Danielle had been at the table, next, nowhere to be seen. As much as she hated to speak to Ronnie, she knew that her friend would possibly have went to her, convinced as she was that Ronnie was some angel. Stacey could barely hide her scorn.

"Yeah, she 'ran' into me" Ronnie said, rolling her eyes as she crossed her arms over her chest.

"Well, where is she?" Stacey asked, growing impatient. She hadn't had a lot to drink, and was still relatively sober, which wasn't what she wanted to be. She didn't want to have to waste time searching for Danielle, when there were drinks to be drunk, guys to be chatted up.

"I don't know, Stacey, she left!" Ronnie exclaimed, turning away, but Stacey reached out and grabbed her arm. "What did you do to her?!" Stacey demanded again, and Ronnie spun around, eyebrows raising so far they almost disappeared under her hair.

"Stacey, for god's sake, nothing! She was in a hurry, she ran straight into me, fell down, I tried to talk to her, and she ran away!" Ronnie exclaimed, her annoyance showing. "Ask _him _if you want to know more" Ronnie finished, nodding toward Paul who was busy clearing away glasses. Stacey eyes slid to Paul, and she suddenly felt sick, the last thing Danielle had needed tonight was to seem, especially so soon after the abortion.

Ronnie yanked her arm from Stacey's grip and started to turn away. "She's _your _friend, Stacey. Nothing to do with me" she said bitterly, walking away, feeling her stomach churn with guilt, she had taken Danielle under her wing slightly, and then abandoned her.

It just hurt so much that was all. She couldn't do it to herself, not the constant reminder of what possibly could have been.

She sighed as she walked away back to the office, neither seeing nor caring about the look of contempt Stacey threw her, before exiting the club.

Ronnie continued toward her office, closing the door firmly behind her, and dimming all sounds of overly loud music. She took a seat at her desk, and reached inside her drawer, helping herself to a glass of vodka, straight from the bottle, wincing as the alcohol burned her throat, finding comfort in the only friend she had.

She stared into space, the sounds of the club around her fading out till they were almost non-existent. She could feel the cold metal of her locket against her chest, tucked away from all other eyes.

She didn't get it out, she didn't have to, she could see ever detail of the picture, remember everything about that day so clearly…

…_The radio played softly in the background, filling the otherwise quiet hospital room. Fourteen year old Ronnie sat up on the bed, her young face filled with utter awe and love as she stared at the tiny bundle in her arms. _

_Her little baby Amy, only hours old, lay looking up at her, perfectly content. Ronnie was terrified, yet unbelievably, inexplicably happy, so filled with joy and love that her heart felt like it would burst, all her emotions, her whole life now filled with light, colour, her whole attention now shifted toward the perfect tiny person she held in her arms. _

_She had never felt such a powerful sense of love before, and she didn't even understand it herself, just that she knew she loved her little baby girl more than life itself, more than anything in the whole world. She traced her baby's features gently, wrapped up in everything, so overcome with emotion that she felt she couldn't speak. The baby squirmed in Ronnie's arms, and she immediately shifted her position, making the little girl more comfortable, the movement completely instinctive. She was a natural. _

"_My baby" she whispered, smiling a little. "My Amy" she whispered, the little baby in her arms so precious to her, the most precious thing she had ever and would ever have. She felt alive, more alive than she ever had done before, this one, small, tiny person had lit young Ronnie's life up completely, everything seemed so much better and more special somehow. She let out a tiny sigh of contentment, not wanting to disturb her daughter, though she could have wept, tears of exhaustion and joy. _

_The two were wrapped up in their own little magical world, all they needed was each other, they were perfect as they were. A brisk knock and opening of the door interrupted their special moment and Ronnie's head snapped up immediately, her young teenage face filling with panic and worry, as her Dad stepped into the room. _

"_Alright V?" he asked in a hushed tone, looking at he with glittering black eyes. "It's time to go" he said softly, making his way over to the bed. Ronnie shook her head frantically, trying in a desperate attempt to lean away from him, to tighten her hold on her daughter, her little baby girl, without disturbing her. _

"_C'mon, Veronica, we've talked about this, don't be silly now" he scolded, coming to a stop beside the bed, and making an attempt to reach for the child in her arms. "No" she managed to choke out, as his arms found her little baby, her precious little Amy. She shook her head, trying to hold on to her child as her Dad lifted her out of her arms. "Please, No, I can look after her, Dad, please don't take her away from me!" the young Ronnie pleaded, eyes filled with tears, as utter panic took over her, her hands grabbing helplessly for her little girl. Archie moved the baby from Ronnie's grasp, stepping back and looking at his eldest daughter with pitiless eyes._

"_It's for the best, V. Best for the kid. You'll see one day" he said, walking away from a distraught Ronnie, his own granddaughter in his arms. _

"_Dad, please!" Ronnie cried, her body shaking with sobs, as she took one last look at her precious baby girl, before the door shut behind them, separating mother and child forever. Ronnie's life crumbled at that moment, her whole world sucked of light and joy in one instant, leaving her devoid of any happiness, just empty, hollow. She tucked herself into a ball and sobbed loudly, as the tears ran down her face…_

Tears trailed down Ronnie's face, and her hands shook as she remember what was both the best and worst day of her life, the memory still so raw and painful that it almost floored her. She rarely allowed herself to think of that day, not fully, not like that, in detail.

What was it about that Danielle girl, that made everything so painful, and dragged up so many painful memories? She poured herself another glass of Vodka, hands still shaking as she wiped her face with the back of her hand.


	3. Chapter 3

_I heard the words come out _

_I felt that I would die_

_It hurt so much to hurt you_

Stacey made her way through the darkened square, cursing silently under her breath, her mutterings dark thoughts based around what she would like to do to 'that Ronnie'.

Danielle was her best friend, and though they had fallen out and Stacey had been overly horrible to her, things were getting back on track, and she hated seeing Danielle being taken advantage of. Knowing that she herself had been guilty of the same crime, it made her all the more angry, to see Danielle treated like dirt, by Paul, by Ronnie and the Mitchell's.

As she made her way past the Vic, she threw it a dark glance. She couldn't comprehend the obsession that Danielle had with Ronnie, even if she was her daughter. As far as Stacey was concerned, Ronnie Mitchell was a bad egg, a Mitchell, rotten to the core like the rest of her family. Just because she shared some DNA with Danielle didn't mean anything, she had nothing to do with the person that Danielle was, but she had never fully voiced this opinion to Danielle, knowing her friend had Ronnie on some sort of pedestal.

Stacey sighed as she thought of Danielle's abortion, if only Danielle had gone to her instead. Ronnie convincing Danielle to get rid of her baby had only further fuelled Stacey's dislike of the blonde club owner. To Stacey it just proved how selfish she was, that Ronnie was trying to ruin Danielle's life aswell, just because she was a miserable cow.

She bit her lip angrily, eyes scanning the square for her friend. As she made her way toward her house, she stopped short, as she saw Danielle sitting on Arthur's bench, tears falling readily into her lap.

Stacey let out a sigh, a wave of relief and pity washing over her as she took in the appearance of her friend. "Danielle" she said, exhaling and making her way over to her.

Danielle looked up as Stacey called her name and made her way over to her, sitting down on the bench beside her, and slipping an arm round her shoulders. "C'mon, Dan, what's the matter?" Stacey said, rubbing the top of Danielle's back.

Stacey mentally scolded herself for insisting that Danielle come out to the club with her, it was obviously far too soon after everything, to be having to deal with Paul and Ronnie, the two biggest reminders of what had happened.

"Everything's so messed up, Stace" Danielle cried, leaning her head on Stacey's shoulder. Stacey shushed her, trying to comfort her. "C'mon Danielle, everything will work out I swear" Stacey tried to placate her friend, and calm her down until she could get her inside.

Danielle pulled away from Stacey almost immediately. "How can you say that?" she demanded, wiping her eyes furiously. "How do you know?"

"I…don't" Stacey shrugged, looking bewildered. Danielle looked at her with an unfathomable expression for a couple of seconds, before turning away, sighing. "I'm sorry, it's just seeing _him_, and then Ronnie…" Danielle's voice tailed off, feeling that familiar ache in her heart that she had felt so many times before. She shivered, and folded her arms tightly across chest. She shook her head.

"C'mon Dan, lets go inside, it's freezin' out here" Stacey said, standing up. Danielle shook her head. "No"

"What?" Stacey asked, frowning. "Don't be daft, Danielle, it's cold, just come inside"

Danielle shook her head again. "No – I – you go ahead. I'll be in soon, I promise…I just want some time alone for now. I need to think about what I'm going to do" she said, breathing in deeply, filling her lungs with the cold crisp air.

Stacey frowned and tilted her head, trying to figure her complex quiet friend out. After a couple of seconds she sighed and nodded. "Fine. Don't be long." She shook her head as she walked away toward the Slater's, taking up the mutterings under her breath once more.

Danielle watched until Stacey went inside the house, and the door was shut behind her, before she started to walk again, her mind far away as her feet carried her in a circle around the square, past the Queen Vic, and then off toward Turpin Way, and the garage. She came to a stop by the playground, leaning her hands on the fence, as she looked over at the swings, hanging still in the night, the children long since tucked up in bed, no one to play on them any more. The gate creaked into the night as she edged it open, barely conscious of what she was doing, as she walked quietly over to one of the swings.

She ran her hand absently up and down the cold chain that connected the swing to the frame, and sat down slowly. She started swinging lightly, gradually kicking her legs and gaining momentum. Once she was a fair height she flung her head back and looked straight up into the black sky, the night cool and clear. She could hardly see the stars for all the harsh city lights, which blocked them from view.

It made her sad, it was one thing she missed about living in Telford, the night sky had been so much clearer there. She breathed in deeply, closing her eyes, and kicked faster, feeling like she was falling through space, just as she had done as a kid. Once she began to feel dizzy, she slowed the swing down, sitting the right way up and opening her eyes.

It was bliss just to escape the trials of her life just for a few seconds. When she stopped it was like crash-landing back to earth, her stomach sinking. She tilted her head back up and looked at the stars. Her mum, Lizzie, had once told her that stars were people who had passed on, looking down on them all, watching over them. Did that mean her mum could see her now? Would she be ashamed of what Danielle had done? Aborting her own baby, leaving her dad and brother behind in search for a mother who had never wanted her?

She pushed the thoughts away, fairly sure of the answer. The swing swayed ever so lightly, and Danielle scuffed her shoe thoughtfully in the dirt. She had some big decisions to make.

She had made the choice to abort her baby, and she knew now, in her heart, that she probably hadn't made that choice for the right reasons. But it was done, it couldn't be taken back, and she would just have to learn to live with that.

Danielle was unsure if anything would ever come of her relationship with Ronnie. Her mother was successful, beautiful, perfect. She didn't need an nineteen year old daughter cluttering up her life, nor would she want one, particularly not Danielle. Maybe if she was prettier, funnier, more like Ronnie herself, then things might be different, but she wasn't. She was just Danielle. A tiny tear dribbled down Danielle's cheek.

***

Ronnie set the glass down and slipped the bottle into her drawer. She stood up, and pulled on her coat. Things were still pretty busy, but she couldn't stand to be in the club anymore, not with thoughts of her Amy, her beautiful daughter in her head. She didn't know why she was being besieged by thoughts of that day so clearly tonight, she rarely permitted herself to ever think of that day in full, and when she did it was when she was alone. Even then, the pain was so unbearable that it almost wasn't worth the remembering.

She hurried out of her office, and called over the music to one of the security guards. "Lock up for me, yeah?" she said, throwing him the keys.

She ran up the steps and left the club, shivering as the cold night air hit her, making her pull her jacket tighter around her. She ran a hand consciously through her hair, her thoughts drifting to Danielle as she walked through the square, as her thoughts always seemed to do whenever she had a spare minute. Whether it was shopping, going for a jog in the morning, opening up the club…Danielle was always there somewhere at the back of her mind, just lurking in the background. And she didn't know _why_.

She had pushed Danielle away when she had gotten too close, because she was afraid. Danielle always seemed to provoke such a strong emotional reaction from Ronnie, and made her think about her baby, maybe because they would've been a similar age, she wasn't sure, but there was something about her…

As Ronnie turned the corner once she past the Vic, she saw something up ahead which made her stop dead in her tracks. There, with her back to her, was Danielle, sitting on one of the swings in the children's playground. Ronnie froze, but then walked on, closer to the young girl. Annoyance burned through her, what the hell had happened earlier on?

Her heels clacked loudly in the silence, but Danielle didn't seem to hear. Ronnie approached the gate to the park, and leaned on it, pausing and waiting to see if Danielle would turn around. When she didn't, Ronnie called her name.

"Danielle!" her voice cut through the air, sharp and stinging. Danielle's head whipped around so fast Ronnie was surprised that she didn't get whiplash. Her mouth gaped open, and no words came out. "What are you doing?" Ronnie asked, shaking her head in confusion. "Nothing" Danielle replied sullenly, turning away from her mother, part of her hoping that Ronnie would just go away. She wanted to see her, but she didn't want to be hurt anymore.

Her heart sank as she heard Ronnie's heels approach her, and a slender hand tap her sharply on the shoulder. She bowed her head and didn't turn around, frantically blinking away all the traces of the light tears which she had been crying. She heard Ronnie sigh, frustrated, and hoped that she would just leave, but she didn't, she moved around so she was standing in front of Danielle, who had no choice this time but to look at her.

Ronnie put her hands on her hips. "What happened back at the club?" she asked bluntly.

"Doesn't matter" Danielle muttered, "Sorry for barging into you" she said as an afterthought.

Ronnie frowned. "That's it?" she asked, raising an eyebrow. Danielle didn't reply.

Ronnie sighed again. "Well…are you alright?" she asked reluctantly.

Danielle met her gaze with dark eyes and a sarcastic smile that didn't suit her at all. "Fine" she said, shaking her head with disgust and looking away. She couldn't even bear to look at Ronnie after all that had happened.

_My life would've been much better if I'd had an abortion. _

Her own mother wished that she had never even been born.

Rage simmered just below the surface.

Ronnie felt herself beginning to grow angry, angry at Danielle for making her feel guilty, like she had something to be sorry for her. It irritated her, and she wanted it to stop.

"Why are you being like this Danielle?" Ronnie snapped. "I'm sick of it, look, sorry if you don't really want to speak to me right now, but it's not my fault what you did. It was your choice" her words cut through the space between them "I don't know why you're looking at me like I should feel guilt or something, you're nothing to do with me!" she finished, raising her voice at the end, in her own desperate attempt to unload any of her feelings of guilt but the words were spat much harsher than she had intended.

She saw Danielle flinch at her words, and a wave of pain washed over her, making her feel horrible, she opened her mouth to apologise but Danielle had jumped up before she had the chance.

As she listened to Ronnie speak to her angrily, say those hurtful words, something inside of Danielle snapped. The part of her that was still making excuses for Ronnie vanished, and in it's place was only the hardened front which she had learned over her time in Walford, shaped by her rejections from Ronnie, Paul, even Stacey at times.

She stood up so fast, she surprised even herself, but didn't let it show. She stepped forward so that she and Ronnie were nose to nose. "And don't I know it!" she shouted, Ronnie recoiling from Danielle's loud exclamation.

"What?" she said in shock, stepping backwards, completely taken aback.

"You think you're so special!" Danielle shouted "You treat everyone like dirt, well I've had enough! I hate you, you evil _cow_!" she screamed, allowing months of pain and rage to flow into her words. She looked at Ronnie with a cold hard stare, and could only feel hatred for the woman in front of her. Ronnie looked at her with wide eyes, unable to find words, something which rarely happened to her.

Danielle exhaled in a little puff, and then a small incredulous half-smile danced across her face, never reaching her eyes. She shook her head. "You've got no idea" she said quietly, almost finding the thought amusing. "You don't have a clue who I am" she shook her head.

Ronnie watched on, worried, with eyes like saucers, completely at a loss as to how to act and not having a clue what Danielle was saying.

"I guess it doesn't matter now. Any of it. Like you said – I'm nothing to do with you" she said darkly her eyes unforgiving, cold.

"I don't know why I thought it should ever be any different. But I can see now. You're incapable of loving anybody but yourself" Danielle whispered, hatred boiling inside of her.

"Danielle – what are you _talking _about?" Ronnie asked, bewildered. Danielle gave half a laugh. "I suppose it doesn't really matter now" she said. "You may aswell know" she shrugged, those usually warm brown eyes still so dark.

She reached up and pulled sharply on the locket around her neck, the chain snapping and some of the links scattering. She scooped it in her palm and then dropped in it on the ground in between herself and Ronnie. Ronnie looked down at it, then up at Danielle, eyes wide with horror, and then back to the ground.

"Now you know" Danielle shrugged, her words void of emotion. She turned her back and slowly walked away, leaving her mother alone, staring down at the locket.

**So – a sad chapter :( I don't like writing unhappy R&D but read on and see how I have fun fixing it lol. This fic isn't really going to go on for that much longer, but I hope you are enjoying it. **

**For any readers of Broken – an update **_**should **_**be coming soon :D**

**Please review :D**

**xxx**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N:- Hey there. So. There's been a lack of updates in all of my fics lately, and I'm sorry to keep you waiting, really. But the fact is, I am so, so, so busy studying for exams right now, and I have literally LOADS of homework to do, so basically my FF writing has taken a back seat for the foreseeable future. **

**Anyhow I hope to update my other R&D fic 'Broken' soon-**_**ish**_**, but no promises I'm afraid. **

**Really sorry to keep you all waiting especially as you all leave amazing comments so thank you :) It really means so much you take the time to review :D**

**Lol also sorry to ramble on but just wanted to give you a bit of an explanation :) **

**Thanks,**

**Xxx**

_Then you look at me_

_You're not shouting anymore_

_You're silently broken_

Time stood still, the whole world coming to an abrupt halt, and Ronnie was frozen on the spot, eyes locked on the locket laid on the ground in front of her. Her head swam as she looked at it, _her _locket. Yet how could it be her locket when she could still feel the weight of it around her neck. Her mouth fell open slightly, and she looked up to see the retreating figure of Danielle. _Now you know_.

Surely Danielle couldn't have been saying what Ronnie thought she had been trying to say? Ronnie felt like all the breath was being squeezed from her lungs, making it almost impossible to inhale or even to move. She slowly reached down in a daze and grasped the broken chain with shaking fingers, standing upright as her legs began to wobble.

The locket was cold against her palm, and her fingers were shaking so badly she could barely open it. Fumbling with the catch as she felt her breathing become erratic, she couldn't let herself even think about what this meant, not until she saw for sure.

The chain trembled in her hand, and her lip quivered with bewilderment, as she slowly, gingerly opened the locket, lying it face up on her palm. She inhaled sharply, as she felt shivers run right up and down her spine and all over her body, as she looked at the face of her fourteen year old self.

Her brain felt like it was jammed, and she was unable to string a coherent thought together, her fingers still shaking uncontrollably. Her fingertips traced the locket disbelievingly, as if she thought it might vanish at any second. The locket, this locket that she had given away with her own little baby all those years ago.

Yet here it was. How could Danielle possibly have it? Her baby was dead, her dad had admitted it. Ronnie felt her heart rate increase and she let out a little sob of disbelief, her eyes filling with tears as her hand closed around the locket. Danielle.

_Now you know. _

Danielle, the locket, her Amy, her little baby. The thoughts swirled round and round in her head, until they finally slotted together, and Ronnie let out a gasp.

"Oh my god" she whispered, her breath misting in the night. She looked up, blinking as a tear escaped her eyelids, looking around her in a daze. Danielle was her _daughter?_

"Danielle" she whispered to herself. In an instant, Ronnie's senses seem to kick into overdrive, and she began to look frantically from side to side. She had to find Danielle. She had to speak with her.

After a couple of seconds, she urged her legs to move, and they obeyed reluctantly, till she was running out of the park, everything just a blur as she passed it. "Danielle!" she called out, desperately as she reached the square. Her eyes scanned the empty square, looking in vain for her daughter.

***

As Danielle walked away from Ronnie, her legs began to shake, and she breathed in and out quickly, urging her legs to move quickly. What the hell had she just done? She thought to herself bewilderedly, hand grasping absently at the empty space where her locket had just been around her neck.

She could barely remember the things she had shouted, just the rage, the utter fury behind them. For so long had her anger at Ronnie built up and up, and she supposed it had only be a matter of time before she finally exploded. But she hadn't wanted it to be like this, not this. She shook her head to herself, eyes swimming with tears.

She hurried through the square, glancing at the Slater's house, and then passing it by. She couldn't hear Ronnie coming after her but if she did that would be the first place she would go.

Ronnie knew who she was. As she realized what she had actually just done, it was hard to stop the panic overpowering her. Her chest felt tight and she urged her feet forward, she had to get away, _now. _On a train, she didn't care where it was going or that she didn't have any of her stuff. All she wanted was to just disappear and never come back to Walford again.

Any chance of Ronnie wanting her were now well and truly destroyed, she thought tearily as she made her way past the Queen Vic, looking up at it regretfully through her tear blurred vision.

***

Ronnie picked up her pace, her heels clacking loudly against the pavement, the sound reverberating through the silent night. She started to run through the square, turning around to look at the Slater house, just as Danielle slipped round the corner of the Vic and out of Ronnie's sight. Ronnie's breathing was erratic as she hurried toward the Slater house. She _had _to see Danielle and talk to her.

She stumbled up the pathway, barely aware of anything other than the fact that Danielle was her _daughter. _She couldn't even formulate any other emotions right now, just utter shock.

She took a deep breath as she approached the door, legs still shaking uncontrollably and began to thump her fist impatiently on the door, her heart pounding. Her mouth felt dry as she heard someone approach the door, and she inhaled sharply as the door was thrown open, only to be disappointed as it revealed Stacey wearing an extremely annoyed look on her face.

"What?!" the young brunette demanded rudely, holding her arms across her chest.

Ronnie gulped and shook her head slightly. "Danielle" she choked out. "Is she here? I have to – to speak to her" Ronnie pleaded, craning her neck to try and see round Stacey into the house, searching for any little glimpse or sign of Danielle.

Stacey's brow furrowed in confusion. "She ain't here. She went for a walk…Why do you want her?" Stacey enquired, frowning heavily.

Ronnie felt her heart sink, if Danielle wasn't here then where the hell was she?

She simply shook her head. "Doesn't matter" she muttered. "Just wanted to talk to her about earlier" she stuttered out, barely paying attention anymore as she turned away without another word and made her way into the square, eyes peeled for any sign of Danielle at all.

Stacey narrowed her eyes, but shut the door slowly, checking her watch and then feeling worried as she saw the time. Where the hell had her friend got to?

***

Danielle eased up on her pace as she reached the launderette and she still couldn't hear any signs that Ronnie was coming after her. Well, why would she? She hadn't wanted her all those years ago, and she certainly wouldn't now, Danielle told herself, folding her arms tightly across her chest, trying desperately to hold in the tears which threatened to fall.

She had no idea where she was going to go as she made her way slowly toward the train station, having to take the long way around as she had stalked off in the wrong direction after leaving Ronnie. As she drew closer to R'n'R she heard and saw a great stream of people emerging from the club, all loud and shouting, and still enjoying themselves, despite the club closing. They all seemed so very happy, laughing like they didn't have a care in the world. Danielle envied them, yet she also felt oddly detatched. She could recognize their joy. But couldn't share in it. She could recognize their laughter. But couldn't laugh. She could recognize their shouts. Yet felt she couldn't speak. She shivered as she walked closer, pushing her way through the crowd in a daze, her destination? As far away from Walford as her feet would allow her.

***

Ronnie breathed in and out quickly, urging her feet to move faster as she hurried through the square, feeling tears well up at the back of her eyes. Confusion and shock where clouding her head, and she felt like she couldn't think straight, she couldn't breathe. Everything that Danielle had told her was whizzing round in her mind, filling up all the space, pushing everything else aside, till it was all she could focus on, it was taking over her, suffocating her.

"Danielle!" she called out helplessly, as if that would bring her child back to her. She made her way past the Vic, eyes scanning the streets desperately as she hurried down, past the café, toward the club. As she neared the club she saw huge scores of people, all tumbling out drunkenly into the street, shouting, laughing, a great bustle of noise, blocking her path.

Just as she felt her heart sink downwards at the mass of people, she saw something which made her freeze for a split second. A flash of blonde hair caught her eye, and her gaze honed in on the back of Danielle's head, Danielle making an attempt to push her way through the crowd of clubbers.

"Danielle!" Ronnie shouted over the crowd, her voice swallowed hopelessly in the night and chaos.

***

Danielle tried her best to push her way through the crowd, trying her best to move past them as quickly as possible. She felt sick to her stomach, the anger and pain still coursing through her, and all she could think of was how badly things had turned out here for her.

She almost turned around as she thought she head someone call her name, but then dismissed it, who would be shouting after her, not unless it was Paul or someone, so all in all, it was best left ignored, she thought, proceeding to slip through a gap in the many groups of people, who had gathered in little groups, some planning to go on to another club, others making their way toward the closest chip shop that was sill open.

***

Ronnie watched in dismay as Danielle slipped through a gap in the throng of people, out of Ronnie's sight. She felt panic close in around her, boxing her in, and she frantically began to push people out of the way, gaining a few dirty looks and insults, but not once stopping to pay any attention. "Danielle!" she shouted again, just as a fresh wave of singing, shouting young men walked in front of her, blocking her path once again and drowning out her voice. "Watch it!" she screamed at one of them as they barged into her shoulder, before desperately pushing them aside and making her way through the people, shouting for Danielle, eyes skimming the crowd, and the fear and panicked feeling growing as she couldn't spot Danielle anywhere, but all the time searching.

***

Danielle felt the lump form in her throat as she reached the edge of the crowd, finding the tears become more and more difficult to hold back. For all that had happened, all that had been said and done, all that time… now it would be all for nothing.

She sniffed as she pushed her way through the final large crowd of people, the empty ache in her chest swelling. She was barely aware of anything other than the pain which had invaded her entire being and now set up camp. So she didn't notice as someone approached her from behind, only aware when she felt an iron tight grip on her arm and she was roughly spun around, looking directly into the eyes of an angry Aiden, the guy she had left earlier at R'n'R, a shifty looking Paul hovering a couple of feet behind him.

"Hey!" she called out in shock, trying instinctively to throw off his grip, taking a step back from him. Aiden only tightened his grip, leaning in toward her.

"What's your game?" he hissed, as Danielle cringed away from his face which drew closer to her own, tears swimming in her eyes as his hand tightened painfully around her arm.

"Let me go!" she bleated helplessly, trying to look around for help but gaining no support.

"You make a fool of me, then just walk away! Why'd you act like you were interested then just flip out when things get a bit heavy?! Paul's told me all about _you,_ so don't pull the innocent card!" he shouted, his face growing red with anger, looking all together out of control. Even Paul seemed disconcerted, taking a slight step toward Aiden and placing a hand on his shoulder. "Here, take it easy mate" he said nervously, retreating as Aiden flung his hand off.

"Shut it Paul!" he hissed, turning his attention back to Danielle, who was still struggling to get away.

He narrowed his eyes. "I think I should teach you a lesson, don't you?" he asked, his voice malicious as he tilted his head at Danielle, whose eyes grew wide with fear and her attempts to throw Aiden off became more frantic.

Paul tittered nervously, looking extremely uncomfortable. "C'mon, Aiden mate, don't be daft, that's just…" he shook his head. "Listen, let her go right?" his request going completely unnoticed or ignored, or a combination of the two.

"Nah, I think something needs to be done 'bout you" Aiden concluded, tightening his grip even further and causing Danielle to cry out in pain. He proceeded in trying to walk away, attempting to drag Danielle with him, as she squealed out in fear. She couldn't believe that this was happening. All she wanted was to leave now, to go home. She wanted her mum.

"Hey!" Paul interjected, looking horrified, stepping in front of Aiden and placing a hand on his chest. "This is too far mate" he shook his head, brow creasing in panic and worry.

"What?!" Aiden exclaimed, leaning in close to Paul so they were almost nose to nose.

The two men and Danielle seemed to become immobile for a second of two, before a voice cut through the air.

"Danielle!" Ronnie screamed out, and Danielle's head swiveled toward the sound, her heart soaring for one split second before she remembered what had and what was going on, coming crashing back down to earth.

***

Ronnie had frozen in ultimate shock and horror as she took in the terrified, tear stained face of Danielle, locked in place by the tight grip which some bloke had on her, and then her bartender, Paul, also standing there. She screamed her daughter's name instantaneously at the very sight of her, in so much pain and fear.

She stood still for a couple of seconds before beginning to run toward her. "What are you doing?!" she shouted at the two young men, the one who had the tight grip on Danielle not releasing her daughter, but instead throwing Ronnie a livid look. "Shut it" he said, turning around to face Paul again, and unintentionally twisting his grip on Danielle's arm as he did so, causing her to whimper in pain.

This was the straw that broke the camel's back for Ronnie, and she didn't even think as her hand flew through the air, and she fisted Aiden right on the nose, causing him to release his hold on Danielle, and stagger backwards, clutching his face and swearing loudly. Paul took several staggered steps backwards, Ronnie breathing very fast, and slightly red in the face, looking lividly at both of the young men.

A police siren sounded in the distance, and though the police hadn't been called to his knowledge, it was enough to spook Paul and he gazed wide eyes at Ronnie for a couple of seconds, before taking off, fleeing in the opposite direction. Seeing Paul take off, and realizing he was all alone, it wasn't long before Aiden scrambled to his feet and also took off running, leaving Ronnie to spin slowly around, and have her heart broken into a thousand tiny pieces again at the sight of Danielle.

Her daughter sank to the ground, shaking uncontrollably, tears spurting silently down her cheeks.

"Danielle" Ronnie whispered fearfully, bending down so she was at her daughter's eye level.

Danielle looked up at Ronnie, her tormentor, her root of all the pain, her savior all rolled into one. Her mother.

Ronnie felt pain explode inside of her as Danielle met her gaze, her brown eyes staring directly into her own. No-one spoke as Ronnie saw the deadened look in Danielle's eyes, the amount of pain and suffering unimaginable. They stared into one another eyes silently as tears poured quietly down Danielle's cheeks.

**So. There you have it. To be honest, I'm really not at all happy with this chapter, and feel that it's such crappy writing from me, I hope it wasn't too bad for you, and please review anyway, any constructive criticism will be happily taken aboard. **

**Thanks for all of your support and patience between update ;)**

**xxx**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N:- Hellooo!!! Lol sorry I haven't updated this in ages, I've been mega busy with studying. Hope you like this chapter. Let me know what you think ;-)**

**X**

_I'd give anything now_

_To kill those words for you_

Ronnie felt her breath hitch in her throat, feeling the tears which threatened her were very close to the surface. She stared into Danielle's deep brown eyes, an endless unknown abyss of fear and pain, the sobs shaking her daughter's frame, and ripping Ronnie's heart open in the process.

She was still in a crouched position, shock and horror locking her muscles and freezing her where she was. "Danielle" she whispered once more, her voice filled with fear. Ronnie took a deep, shuddering breath, shaking her head. "Please – I – I" she faltered, unable to concentrate on words when her child was in such distress. Those boys… her thoughts tailed off and she shivered.

"Danielle – are you hurt, did they hurt you?" she stuttered. She watched as Danielle tore her gaze away from Ronnie, still crying, then shook her head.

Ronnie felt her chest relax slightly, the teeniest amount of relief seeping into her emotions. She flexed her fingers and reached out hesitantly, unsure as to what it was she was trying to do. Danielle was inconsolable, way past the point of reason or sense, her daughter was so defeated, all she could was sit on the cold concrete ground and cry her heart out. Because of Ronnie. It was like a blade through her heart.

She touched Danielle's arm, and felt like she had just received an electric shock, the sensation making her whole arm tingle. This was real. Her child, living, breathing, _alive,_ right in front of her. The whole situation was so overwhelming, Ronnie felt like she might faint. But she barely had a split second to bask in the incredulity of it all, because Danielle was still crying, distraught, and Ronnie had to help her, to try and fix it, as much for her own sake as it was for Danielle's.

"Danielle" Ronnie pleaded, this time unable to stop her eyes filling from tears. "I'm sorry, I'm so, so sorry" she mumbled, inching closer, she kept her hand on Danielle's arm, and Danielle didn't pull away. But Ronnie suspected that that was because Danielle was far too upset to notice. "C'mon, Danielle, please, it's freezing" Ronnie pleaded, noticing Danielle shiver. She inched closer still, noticing how Danielle flinched ever so slightly, as if afraid, afraid of Ronnie.

Ronnie swallowed, a few of her tears spilling over, sliding gently down her cheek. She reached up her hand, placing it very lightly on Danielle's shoulder, too scared to move any closer. "Danielle, look at me. Please" Ronnie whispered, and Danielle turned her head marginally to face Ronnie, her eyes still looking away. Her entire body was trembling, but the sobs were not as pronounced as they were before, though the tears still flowed relentlessly down her cheeks.

Ronnie inhaled, trying her hardest to hold back her own sobs. "Danielle?" she said hesitantly, retracting her hand ever so slightly. She wasn't at all sure what to do anymore, in fact, she was at a complete loss.

Slowly, Danielle dragged her eyes up to meet Ronnie's, the agony in them impossible to hide. Suddenly, unable to stop herself, Ronnie reached out with her other hand, and touched Danielle's cheek lovingly, so gentle. It seemed to be the final straw for Danielle. Ronnie's touch and loving gaze brought on a fresh round of uncontrollable sobbing, more violent than before, and Ronnie's eyes widened in horror. As she was just about to move away as quickly as possible, sure that her presence had brought on this round of hysteria, she felt Danielle's head fall against her shoulder.

Ronnie froze for a second, feeling Danielle's body quaking with sobs, before she instinctively opened her arms, and wrapped them tightly around her daughter's weak torso. Danielle leaned helplessly against her mother, making no attempt to cling to Ronnie, just giving up, too defeated, too beaten down to anything other than sob, cry like she had never cried before. In one swift move, Ronnie rose to her feet, clutching Danielle close to her, pulling her daughter off the cold hard ground. She staggered for a moment under almost Danielle's full weight, before positioning her at her side, flinging an arm round her shoulders to take her weight, and heave her along, as Danielle cried into Ronnie's shoulder.

Slowly, listlessly, Ronnie began to move along, her heart thudding, feeling a thousand tiny pinpricks pierce her with every new sob which escaped Danielle's throat. What she wouldn't give now to just turn back the clock. What she wouldn't give to make everything better, to take back every single hurtful action and word.

She swallowed very hard, moving thoughtlessly toward her own flat. As they reached the square, Ronnie paused. Should she take Danielle back to the Slater's?

With one dubious glance at her daughter, her mind was made up and she continued toward her own house, Danielle calming down slightly, and beginning to walk more on her own. Her hysterical sobs had died down, though the tears still poured incessantly down her cheeks.

Ronnie wiped the back of her own cheeks, her heart swelling with sadness. This wasn't how it was supposed to be, an inconsolable daughter, distraught because of all the terrible things Ronnie had said to her. Another tears escaped her eyelids as she realized how terrible she had acted. What she wouldn't give to take it all back, to wipe all the words, memories away. What she wouldn't give…


	6. Chapter 6

**A very big thank-you to all my reviewers. Your comments are all so encouraging and greatly appreciated, they always motivate me to write more :D I think I might extend this fic just a **_**little**_** bit longer than I had originally planned, because of the hugely positive feedback I've received :) **

_Each time I say something I regret, I cry "I don't want to lose you."  
But somehow I know that you will never leave me_

Ronnie's fingers were trembling as she fumbled around in her bag with one hand, searching desperately for her keys. Her breath came out in a little huff as she supported most of Danielle's weight with one arm. She could feel Danielle's shoulders quaking with sobs which she knew Danielle was desperately trying to control. Her fingers eventually clasped around the cold hard metal of her keys and she wasted no time in shoving them in the lock, pushing the door open.

She guided Danielle inside, feeling the panic which had a hold of her tighten. She remembered the last time Danielle had been in her flat, and had to suppress a shudder of horror at what she had done and said.

Ronnie dumped her bag on the floor, and used her foot to slam the door behind her still, more or less, holding Danielle up. Her daughter was leaning heavily against her, but Ronnie wasn't sure that was because she wanted Ronnie to hold her, or she was too exhausted to protest. She feared it was the latter.

Danielle wouldn't meet her eyes as Ronnie led her gently through to the living room, sitting her down on the very couch where she had told Ronnie that she was pregnant.

Danielle inhaled sharply as she perched on the edge of the sofa, gulping down the air as she tried desperately to quite the sobs which were escaping from her throat. With a great deal of effort, she managed to bite down on her lip, holding back the sobs, her shoulders only jerking every couple of seconds in a silent hiccup. The tears still poured relentlessly from her eyes, and there didn't seem to be anything she could do about them but they no longer made a sound.

She felt Ronnie sit down beside her, and she her arm tingled as Ronnie reached out and ran a hand up and down it.

"Danielle?"

She didn't look up, just ducked her head, biting back the lump in her throat. Ronnie's voice sounded so unsure and fearful. Danielle felt unbelievably embarrassed that Ronnie had found her in that situation, and she felt a blush rush to her cheeks as she remembered the way she had acted and shouted at Ronnie.

Why had she done it? Why had she revealed the truth in such a way that meant now Danielle was sure Ronnie wouldn't want anything to do with her. Things had never been that way before so why should they change now? She heard her mother sigh lightly. The sound brought many memories rushing to the surface , all of them reminders of when Ronnie had been impatient or irritated with her.

Danielle tensed, preparing herself from the onslaught of Ronnie's words, but they never came. She felt Ronnie stand up, and Danielle took the moment to fully take in her surroundings. She knew that she was in Ronnie's flat, and it wasn't until now that she realized that the fact was strange. Why would Ronnie take her back to her own flat when she could have just landed her back at the Slater's?

She must've been in a worst state than she realized, she thought to herself, still not daring to look into Ronnie's eyes. Not when the tears were still making their way down her cheeks. What a weakling, she scolded herself. She couldn't find the energy or the inner strength to stop herself, but she still detested it. She had been strong before, using all of her pent up rage of the past few months and releasing them all on Ronnie in one rushed, glorified moment, but it seemed to have sapped every ounce of her energy.

The feeling when she had stumped Ronnie, told her exactly who she was and flung that locket at her… it was indescribable. Relief, anguish, hurt, and then worry all rolled into one. For a moment she had been so tall, so built up with fury that she was capable of taking Ronnie on, of ever living up to the reputation of the Mitchell's. But now she was sitting sniveling, again in Ronnie's flat, while her mother took pity on her after she had had to have been rescued from some idiots.

The thought of Ronnie's pity stirred up some of the anger again in the pit of Danielle's stomach, but it wasn't enough. Nowhere near enough.

Ronnie seemed to be dithering, hovering awkwardly by Danielle, not saying a word, and though Danielle itched to know what was going on, she still couldn't bring herself to look into those eyes again.

She winced and crossed her arms wrapping them firmly around her stomach, hair falling in front of her eyes. She shivered involuntarily, feeling like the cold had seeped into her bones.

"God, you're freezing. I'll get you some tea, OK? Wait here" Ronnie said, leaping into action.

Danielle didn't respond, her mind whirring at a million miles an hour. Wait here, she thought scornfully, hugging herself. It wasn't exactly like she was going to go anywhere else was it? Though, she pondered, that probably wouldn't be a bad idea. She listened to Ronnie as she made her way out of the room and entered the kitchen. As she heard the hum of the kettle when it was switched on, she stood up quickly.

She didn't want to wait here any longer than was necessary. She would just slip out quietly and save the pair of them any more embarrassment.

She still had her arms crossed tightly over her chest as she made her silently to the door, wiping her eyes surreptitiously with the back of her hand. Her tears had slowed considerably, but they still brimmed in her eyes.

She made her way almost to the hall, and was just preparing to dash quickly out of the front door, when Ronnie made a reappearance in the room. She swung round the door frame, almost knocking into Danielle.

Danielle froze and took a small, unconscious step backward, looking at the floor, the wall, anywhere but Ronnie, feeling like a criminal caught in the act.

Ronnie blinked in shock, clutching some blankets in her hand. She paused, watching as Danielle almost leapt back from her, and looked away, those big brown eyes swiveling frantically from one thing to the other, making her look like a caged animal.

Ronnie opened her mouth to speak, but she couldn't find the words. Danielle's entire demeanor, the way she was so silent, scared, furious, it broke her heart. She had behaved so awfully that she had turned her daughter into a quivering wreck. Danielle had barely waited till she was out of the room before she had tried to run away. The thought made tears brim in her eyes, and she yearned to just reach out and take Danielle in her arms and never let go, not ever again.

"Danielle" she breathed, her voice a strangled gasp, as she struggled to get a hold on herself. "I – I- where are you going?" she asked, the desperation and panic in her voice, making the words sound much more abrupt than they were meant to.

She watched as Danielle pulled her arms tighter round herself, seeing the goosebumps on her daughter's arm, still there from when she had been sitting outside on the freezing concrete. She saw a flash of anger in Danielle's eyes, the same fury that she had witnessed barely an hour before. Ronnie braced herself, ready for Danielle to start screaming at her, or something, but it never came. The flicker of anger faded away, and Danielle's shoulders slumped again.

The pain in her daughter's eyes was unbearable, she couldn't reach Danielle through it. Ronnie felt like someone had grabbed her by the throat and they were squeezing tighter and tighter with every passing second, making it impossible to breathe. She was entirely at a loss as to how to proceed. Danielle was scared out of her wits, wouldn't look at her. She obviously hated her. _And with good reason, _a small voice said in Ronnie's head, but she pushed it away.

If Danielle wanted to leave, then Ronnie knew that she should stand aside and let her daughter leave. But selfishly, she didn't think she could bear it, if she watched Danielle walk away from her, possibly out of her life, she knew it would destroy the little that was left of her.

The kettle finished boiling and clicked off in the other room. Ronnie blinked several times, and then sniffed. "Uh…" she stammered, walking over to the couch and sitting the blankets down on the seat.

She ran a hand through her hair. She was flustered and she knew that it showed, something that was confirmed as she saw Danielle sneak a sideways glance at her.

Danielle took a deep breath, itching to just run out of the door. She couldn't bear being with Ronnie, knowing that her mother didn't want her. It hurt more than she had ever imagined. Just because Ronnie felt guilty and had rescued her from Paul and his horrible friend, didn't mean that anything had changed. Ronnie would still wish that she had gotten rid of her before she was born, she thought to herself, the pain driving itself through her heart.

She shook her head, "I should go" she whispered, taking a step toward the door.

Ronnie felt her muscles freeze in panic. "Look, Danielle, I'm sorry!" she spluttered, desperate to show her daughter how much she regretted how things had panned out. "Please, look, it's freezing outside!" she exclaimed, clutching at straws, standing up, but still keeping her distance.

"Ronnie…" Danielle started, her voice small, tailing off as she felt the lump at the back of her throat grow larger.

Ronnie interjected, "No, look, please, I didn't mean it. Danielle, I – I'm _so _sorry" she was begging now, as the tears threatened her once more.

Danielle swallowed. She couldn't bear this, the pity. She shook her head. "Ronnie, stop" she said, trying to make her voice sound strong, confident. It worked. Ronnie stopped, words halfway to her mouth. Her daughter continued, "Stop saying you're sorry. Just because you've had a fit of conscience and you feel guilty…I don't need your pity, OK?!" she finished, her words making her sound a lot stronger than she actually was feeling. The rage brought on by the thought of Ronnie's _pity_ also helped, and she clung to it, because it seemed anger was the only useful emotion that she had right now.

"My pity?" Ronnie repeated, her brow creasing in pain and confusion. She hated to see how cut up Danielle was, knowing she had caused it.

"Yes, your _pity_" Danielle scorned, just about managing to hide the tremble in her voice. "I don't need it" she continued, turning even further away from Ronnie than she already was, till she almost had her back to her. She didn't want Ronnie to see her tears any longer. "Whatever this is, whatever you're doing, just stop it. I know that you don't want, you never have!" Danielle almost yelled, her voice cracking on the last word.

Ronnie took a half-step toward her daughter and then froze once more, utter disbelief crowding out every other thought. She gaped wordlessly at her daughter, barely able to see Danielle's face anymore, the teen had turned so far away from her.

She was stunned beyond belief, feeling more and more sick as she remembered what she had told Danielle on the phone. _My life would've been much better if I'd had an abortion. _She wanted to hit herself. She wanted to scream and cry, and shout at the top of her lungs that it wasn't true. But she didn't. She just stood there, frozen on the spot like an idiot.

"See" Danielle muttered "You can't even deny it"

The statement seemed to kick Ronnie into action. "Like hell I can't!" she exclaimed, taking two long strides over to Danielle, stopping just short of actually touching her. "Danielle – I didn't mean _any _of what I said to you! I thought you were dead, for goodness sake!" she cried. "You have no idea, how much I've longed for you, every single day. It's cursed my whole life, losing you, I swear. I would never – never say that – that I wish – you'd" Ronnie broke off, unable to speak any longer. She raised a hand to her mouth, crying silently.

Her eyes glistened with tears as she watched Danielle turned round ever so slowly, face wary with disbelief and fear. She looked shocked by the state that Ronnie was in. She shook her head. She still didn't dare meet Ronnie's eyes directly. "What are you saying?" she whispered, unwilling to even dare hope.

Ronnie took another tiny step forward. "I'm saying" she spoke through her tears, "That I love you, Danielle. I always have" she started to cry again.

Danielle's own eyes filled up and she shook her head slightly. This was so surreal, staring into Ronnie's perfect porcelain face, her blue eyes streaming with tears as she told Danielle that she loved her.

Danielle felt like she was struggling to breathe. "This – I – you can't –" Danielle stammered incoherently.

Ronnie inhaled deeply, and reached out boldly, taking Danielle's hands in her own, and raised them to her face. She kissed the back of Danielle's hand and then moved them to the side of her face and held them there, till Danielle was cupping Ronnie's face in her hands. For the first time, Danielle looked properly into her mother's eyes.

As their gazes locked, Ronnie felt her heart leap. She held Danielle's hands firmly to her face, never breaking the eye-contact. "This" she began, "This right here. I love you, Danielle."

Danielle gaped, desperate to believe Ronnie's words.

"My pity?!" Ronnie continued, never letting her eyes leave Danielle's face. "My pity? Me pity you? How could I do that?" she said, incredulous. "You're my baby" she finished, a sob escaping her throat.

Danielle burst into a flood of joyful tears as she practically flung herself into Ronnie's arms. Ronnie staggered for a moment, letting Danielle's hands fall from her face, before she caught herself, wrapping her arms firmly round Danielle's body, pressing her child to her. "Oh!" she gasped, tears flowing uncontrollably from her eyes. She clutched at Danielle, her baby in her arms, at long last.

Danielle buried her face into Ronnie's shoulder as the two of them cried together. Ronnie stroked Danielle's hair, unable to believe that she was actually holding her daughter in her arms. Her daughter.

"Baby" Ronnie murmured, kissing the top of Danielle's hair, happiness and warmth flooding her whole body. She felt a sense of well-being flush her body, her love for Danielle almost flooring her. "Baby, my baby" she murmured again, pressing her cheek against the top of Danielle's head. "My baby" she cried.

**Merry Christmas! :D**

**Lol so this is my Christmas gift to you all, it's the last thing I'll be writing till after the holidays so I hope you enjoyed :P I just couldn't go out on a depressing note :D Please review and let me know what you thought. I hope you all have a nice Christmas! :D**

**Kirsty**

**xxx**


	7. Chapter 7

**Hello again, as always thanks for the amazing reviews :) I'm so pleased that people seem to like this story so much, I never intended for it to be as long as this :D  
**_  
__'Cause you were made for me  
Somehow I'll make you see  
How happy you make me_

After a few moments of holding Danielle in her arms in the middle of her living room, Ronnie slowly seemed to come back to her senses. One hand stroked Danielle's hair absent-mindedly as she slowly began to become aware of what was around her once more. Danielle's sobs had ceased completely, and her breathing was short and steady as she leaned her face into Ronnie's shoulder, Ronnie able to feel Danielle's hot breath on her arm.

She felt almost faint as she held onto her daughter tightly. She moved toward the couch, gently pulling Danielle with her, careful never to break the contact. Danielle moved with her obligingly, she too seemingly more aware of things now. There was no more hysteria, no more sobbing. She felt calmed as Ronnie held her close.

Ronnie sank clumsily onto the sofa, pulling Danielle down after her. She screwed her eyes shut for a second and squeezed Danielle a little tighter before releasing her daughter from the hug. She peeled her arms away from where they were tightly wrapped around Danielle's torso. Instead she placed them on Danielle's shoulders, looking her daughter in the eye.

Danielle's face looked a little flushed. She locked eyes with Ronnie, staring wordlessly into her mother's face. Ronnie's heart leapt at the sight of her daughter, so beautiful, perfect as she sat before her. She reached up and tucked a strand of Danielle's hair behind her ear, a smile blessing her features. She reached over carefully and plucked up one of the blankets that she had brought through before, just when they had first entered the flat. She opened it out and then pulled it around Danielle's shoulders, rubbing the tops of her arms before letting her hands travel to cup her face lightly.

"I can't believe it's really you" whispered Ronnie with joy, her eyes shining.

Danielle sat, absorbed, savouring ever little touch and word spoken so lovingly by Ronnie. For so long this was what she had longed for. It felt like a magical dream, all this time she had been wishing, hoping for Ronnie to love her, to want her. She had believed that it would never have been possible. She had thought Ronnie hated her, but this, _this_ truly was a dream come true.

Danielle looked at Ronnie, so breath-taking and stunning and she let out a little laugh. "Me either" she murmured back, shaking her head slightly.

Ronnie cocked her head to the side but didn't answer. "My daughter" she murmured to herself quietly in awe. "My Amy" her voice was revered as she stroked Danielle's cheek. She honestly couldn't believe it. She shook her head.

"How?" she whispered, grazing Danielle's cheek gently with her thumb. "How can this be possible?"

A tiny crease appeared between Danielle's eyes. She bit her lip.

Ronnie leaned forward slightly shifting on the couch so that her legs were folded underneath her. "I thought – My dad-" Ronnie shook her head. "He told me you were...dead" her voice was hushed. She saw Danielle's eyes cloud with confusion.

"A-Archie?" Danielle stammered. "Why would he s-say that?"

Ronnie only shook her head again. "I knew he hated me, but I didn't think he would lie about this. I was so _sure_ he was telling the truth" Ronnie's eyes filled with tears.

Danielle swallowed, feeling a little flutter of fear in her heart. "Ronnie – I'm not lying, I swear. I really _am _your daughter" Danielle nodded her head, studying Ronnie closely with wide, fearful eyes.

Ronnie bit her lip, a couple of her teardrops spilling over. A small smile splayed on her lips. "I know" she sniffed joyfully, reaching into her pocket with one hand. She slowly pulled out the small metal locket, her heart leaping as she set her eyes on it again. Danielle watched her carefully.

Ronnie sniffed again, as she opened the catch with trembling hands, revealing the tiny picture of her own young face. She gently took Danielle's hand and spread it open, placing the locket face up in the centre of her palm. Danielle just looked on silently, holding her breath.

Slowly, Ronnie retracted her hands from Danielle's face, reaching up behind her neck. She unfastened the locket which had hung around her neck for so long. Her fingers were still shaking noticeably as she opened it up, inhaling sharply as she set eyes on the angelic face of her Amy. Her Danielle.

She met Danielle's gaze again. She held the picture of her baby up. "See? I've always had you with me. I didn't ever let you go" she started to cry silently. She pressed the locket firmly into Danielle's already outstretched palm. She smiled, as set the lockets beside each other, the matching pair, together at long last. "Together" she whispered. "Just like they should be"

Danielle's eyes shone with tears. She could barely believe this. Ronnie actually wanted her, had kept the locket which matched her own, had kept it for all these years. She closed her hand in a fist around the lockets, squeezing them tightly together. She closed her own eyes just as tightly for a moment, tears spurting down her cheeks once more.

Eyes still screwed shut, she felt it as Ronnie shifted and her arms encircled her again. She felt Ronnie pull her close, into a loving embrace. Danielle didn't even dare open her eyes, just allowed herself to be swept up in the hug. She leaned against Ronnie, as her mother shifted her so that Danielle was almost sitting in Ronnie's lap. She just buried her head further into Ronnie's shoulder, inhaling her soft lavender scent. Ronnie's arms were strong yet gentle as they held her close, warm and comforting. She stroked her hair gently, rocking her ever so slightly, the hug caring and motherly. Danielle existed only in that moment alone, praying that the moment would never end.

She had no idea how long she remained like that. She pulled back reluctantly after a time, allowing herself to look into Ronnie's face again. She shook her head slightly. "Ronnie?" she whispered.

Ronnie met her gaze with clear, adoring eyes. "Yes?"

Danielle swallowed, wiping her eyes. "If you didn't mean it – then why did you say it?" her tone was pleading.

Ronnie exhaled very slowly, knowing exactly what Danielle meant. She sucked in a sharp breath and started to speak. "Because...I thought it was what you wanted. When you came to me, you were so...scared. Out of your depth. And you reminded me so much of myself when I was..." she pulled back slightly as she spoke, giving them both some room to move. Danielle listened intently to her every word. She continued with a deep breath. "I just thought – that it would be easier for you. If you believed me having a baby was a mistake...it would make your decision seem like the right one" Ronnie's eyes glistened with tears. "I'm so sorry, Danielle. I should have told you the truth, I know. The whole time we were in that room...." Ronnie paused briefly, repressing a shudder. "The whole time we were sitting there – I had to fight to stop myself tearing those pills away from you" the tears were falling readily now, watched by a stunned Danielle, as Ronnie re-lived and fully realised what she had done.  
"I wanted to tell you to hold onto your baby, to hold on tightly and not to ever let go. But I didn't" Ronnie shook her head in disgust with herself. Danielle continued to watch silently. "I thought that if it's what you wanted – what you needed-then I shouldn't have let my own views stand in your way" she inhaled sharply.

Danielle stared with her mouth slightly agape. If only Ronnie had just told her all of this to begin with...

"Why didn't you _say?" _ Danielle asked, shaking her head. "Why did you say all that about your own baby – about me- why didn't you come with me the next day?" she garbled.

"If you had known...the truth, you wouldn't ever have went through with it" Ronnie spoke through her tears.

Danielle pulled her arms from Ronnie's grip, leaning away. "And that would've been a bad thing?" she whispered incredulously, her face filling with hurt.

"No!" Ronnie bleated. "But – I thought – it – it was what you w-wanted?"

Danielle shook her head. "No, no you didn't!" she pulled away as much as she loathed to do so. She flinched back violently when Ronnie reached out for her and she jumped off the sofa. "Why would you think that was best? That I wanted it?!" Danielle raised both hands to her head in disbelief "For God's sake, the only reason I did it was because of what _you _said".

Ronnie stood up, arms reaching out for Danielle. "Please, I know, I'm sorry Danielle" she sobbed.

Danielle froze on the spot, still shaking her head back and forth, holding her head in her hands. She felt sick as she thought of the abortion. It had been bad enough when she thought Ronnie had hated her, that having the baby would have been much worse. But now...

"I killed my baby" Danielle whispered. "I thought...it would bring us closer together. You know I was going to tell you the next day, at the second appointment...But you never showed up. All I got was a phone call letting me know what a huge, big mistake I am!" Danielle screeched at the end, everything suddenly welling up inside her and overwhelming her.

Ronnie gaped, aghast. How awful must she have been if this is what she had turned Danielle into?

"I'm sorry, OK!" Ronnie cried over Danielle, stepping closer and gripping the tops of Danielle's arms, forcing Danielle to look into her face. Ronnie shuddered from the look of hate and hurt that Danielle gave her but she didn't let go. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry that I talked you into it, I'm sorry that I didn't come with you that second day! I was stupid and selfish because I couldn't stand watching you go through it again. It hurt me so much, I couldn't even think about how you were feeling" she sobbed hopelessly.

"I got rid of my baby...Because I thought it would make everything better. But then you left me with nothing" Danielle spat.

Ronnie flinched with every word, knowing it was all true. She shuddered with realisation at how Danielle's words described exactly how Ronnie had felt after coming home from the hospital all of those years ago, how she had felt toward her father.

"Why _do _you even care, Ronnie?! Why are you doing all of this, if you gave me away in the first place?" Danielle was unstoppable, rage overpowering her. She started to struggle in Ronnie's grip, the arms which had been protecting just moments ago, now restraining.

"Danielle, listen" Ronnie pleaded but her words had no effect on her daughter's upset state.

Tears of pain and fury tumbled from Danielle's eyes, as she continued to struggle in Ronnie's firm grip. "No, I'm done listening! I had an _abortion_ because of you, and you never even wanted me! So Just. Let. Me. _Go!" _ she screeched, bursting into noisy sobs, desperately trying to wriggle free.

Ronnie didn't loosen her grip, just tugged Danielle closer to her, encaging her in a firm, protective hold, closing her eyes. Danielle continued to struggle for a couple of seconds before giving in, collapsing in a sobbing heap in Ronnie's arms.

Ronnie held her close once more. She kissed the top of Danielle's head, feeling a swell of remorse and love swell in her heart. "I'll never let you go, Danielle" she whispered. "I can promise you that".

"Now" she murmured, holding Danielle close to her body. "I want you to listen to me, Danielle, OK?"

Danielle nodded meekly into Ronnie's chest.

"I have _always_ wanted you" murmured Ronnie, as she rested her cheek on Danielle's head. "Even all those years ago...If I could have kept you then I would have, I promise. I know that this is going to be hard for you to believe, but Danielle, I love you. I can't help it, can't make it go away, and I wouldn't want it to anyway" Ronnie continued to talk quietly, her voice saturated with love and devotion.

Danielle continued to cry, but listened closely to Ronnie's words.

Her mother didn't stop her flow of speech as she held her arms locked round Danielle's torso.

"And I am so sorry that I've hurt you. But I am going to make this better. Danielle, I swear, if it takes me the rest of my life, I _will _make you see how much you mean to me. You're all that matters to me, all that's ever mattered" her voice cracked on the last few words, a dry sob escaping her throat.

She squeezed Danielle a little tighter, the tears cascading down her cheeks. "I love you" she whispered.

Danielle said nothing, but hugged Ronnie back. The two clung to each other tightly. Each was a life-raft to the other, the only salvation in the midst of the raging storm of emotion which surrounded them.


	8. Chapter 8

**I'm off sick just now, so this is why I've had time to write this. Not sure if it's any good. Firstly, I think I need to apologise for the length of time it has taken me to update this story. Sorry.  
OK, so this was originally the final chapter of this story, but I've decided that after this chapter there will be just one more, which will flow on directly from the end of this. **

_I can't live this life  
Without you by my side  
I need you to survive_

Ronnie's arms were locked tightly around her daughter's body. Her hands were trembling as she held Danielle up, and her eyes were closed, every sob which escaped Danielle, a knife to Ronnie's heart. Danielle's body quaked with the tears which fell freely from her eyes, as she allowed Ronnie to support her weight. She barely noticed as Ronnie almost dragged her back over to the couch once more, collapsing into it and pulling Danielle almost on top of her.

Ronnie's arms were unyielding in their grip. They were warm and strong as they surrounded Danielle, swallowing her up. Ronnie gave her a little squeeze, as if her arms could shield her daughter from the hurt that was eating them both alive. Ronnie's own cheeks were wet with tears as she pressed her face wordlessly into Danielle's hair. "I'm sorry" she sobbed. "I'm so, so sorry" the words were strangled as she choked them out, overcome with the remorse which besieged her. Danielle was utterly distraught, traumatised by the way Ronnie had treated her, the things she had said. The things she had done.

Ronnie couldn't blame Danielle for lashing out at her. But she could try her best to make things better.

Ronnie took a deep stuttering breath, her eyes flickering open. Her arms were still locked tightly around Danielle, though Danielle made no attempt to return the brace, but had simply folded herself into it, allowed Ronnie to wrap her up in her arms. When Ronnie thought of Danielle's screams to be let go, her heart felt like it was being ripped to tiny shreds. But she couldn't let go. She just couldn't. Even thinking about the words, and as Danielle let out a particularly harrowing sob, Ronnie squeezed Danielle just a little tighter. She didn't move from her position, just held Danielle as close as possible as the sobs cried themselves out. Her hand stroked Danielle's hair soothingly, and Ronnie screwed her eyes tightly shut once more, waiting for the gut-wrenching sobs to cease.

Eventually, after what seemed an age, Danielle's body stopped quivering so much, and her sobs faded out, giving way to light hiccups. She pressed her face deep into Ronnie's shoulder, as she struggled to regain composure. This was _not_ good. In all the different scenarios that Danielle had pictured, her screaming at Ronnie and then collapsing into her arms, sobbing, was never one that she'd foreseen. Ronnie's words swam around and around in her head, and there was no escape from them. The guilt which had been simmering just below the surface for the last three weeks had now bubbled over, and was slamming into her like stormy waves on a rock. She had really done it. She had killed her baby.

She could feel angry at Ronnie, place as much blame on her as she liked, pour out all of her rage and hatred at herself and project at her mother but... Rage is a flame that burns to brightly to last for long. And when Danielle felt her rage ebb away, all she was left with was the regret. The remorse and the sorrow, and an empty shell of who she used to be.

She couldn't fight anymore. She didn't have any fight left in her. Her only comfort was Ronnie's words. _I love you. _Did she really mean them? Could all these months of cold-hearted rejection be washed away by this one simple statement? Danielle could still feel Ronnie clinging tightly to her, as if for dear life. She focused on that, seeking out the only comfort she could find.

"I'm sorry" Ronnie whispered once more, her voice hushed, as she ran her hand again over Danielle's hair.

Danielle inhaled deeply, and shifted backward, breaking fee of Ronnie's tight grip. She pushed herself back, wiping her cheeks as she looked directly into Ronnie's eyes. "Why?" she said quietly.

Ronnie widened her eyes, her empty arms now curled in an awkward outstretched position, almost still cradling her daughter, but not quite. She opened her mouth, her mind going blank.

Danielle shook her head slightly, still leaning away from Ronnie. "It wasn't you. It was me. It's all my fault" she whispered, her voice tiny, as she closed her eyes in defeat.

"No" Ronnie shook her head violently, placing her hand on Danielle's shoulder, but still respecting her daughter's need for space. Her face was scrunched up with pain as she watched Danielle fall apart at the seams.

Danielle nodded her head. "Yes it is" her whispered voice was eerily calm, eyes still closed. "I did it. It was me, _I _got an abortion. _I_ didn't tell you. _I_ lied for all these months._ I've_ ruined everything" she spoke in a hushed tone, almost to herself.

Ronnie gaped, horrified. The sobbing had been bad enough, but this was torturous. "No, Danielle!" Ronnie repeated, her voice laced with tears. "That's not true, _please!" _she begged, reaching out and cupping Danielle's chin, forcing eye-contact once more. "Please don't say that. It's not ruined, it's _not" _her lip was pouted a little in defiance as the hot tears spurted down her cheeks. She hated this, hated that Danielle was beating herself up inside.

Danielle blinked at Ronnie, looking at her mother's tears. "How can we get past this, Ronnie?" she murmured, still speaking in the same defeated tone. "I thought that telling you would make me feel better, would make a difference...But it doesn't" she looked away, eyelashes spiked with tears. "All it does is complicate the pain... it doesn't take it away" her voice cracked on the last word.

Ronnie shook her head again, in utter disbelief. "Of course it does, of course it helps" Ronnie whispered. "How could _this_" Ronnie took her hand away from Danielle's chin to stroke her hair "be made worse – If I still didn't know. Didn't know that _you, _my baby...that you're still alive" a ghost of a smile quivered on Ronnie's lips, her eyes softening with the love which portrayed itself underneath the agony.

Her eyes flickering slowly back to meet Ronnie's, Danielle felt her throat dry. Her heart thudded unevenly against her ribs, as yet more tears pricked the corner of her eyes. She couldn't take this in. Ronnie was acting so lovingly, saying all the right things, desperate to look after her. Wasn't this what she had always wanted?

"But – but everything that's happened?" Danielle's voice tailed off, and she bit her lip. "Ronnie I-" she struggled to regain her train of thought. "I – I can't do it" she shook her head, eyes shining. Even as she spoke, her hand moved to the one that Ronnie had placed on her arm. Danielle curled her fingers round Ronnie's palm, squeezing her hand desperately. "I can't do it" she repeated, choking the words out, clinging to Ronnie's hand as if her life depended on it.

"What?" Ronnie asked, holding Danielle's cheek. "What can't you do?" she begged for an answer, voice choked with tears.

Danielle inhaled deeply, shuddering as she started to lose control over her emotions again. "_This_" she breathed, looking down at her hand, which was wrapped round Ronnie's. "Why do you suddenly care about me?" she whispered. "I'm nothing to do with you – just like you said"

Ronnie felt her breathing increase, as her heart squeezed at Danielle's words. She shook her head, and sat up straighter, folding her legs underneath her so she was kneeling. She cupped Danielle's cheek tightly, locking her eyes with Danielle's. "Danielle" her tone was desperate, and slightly exasperated. "You are _everything_ to me. Losing my baby – losing you – it destroyed me. All that I've ever wanted, in my whole life, is _you"_ hot tears spilled over, in her attempt to make Danielle see the truth.

"But it's not" Danielle interrupted, her fearful eyes locked on Ronnie's. "You want your baby, your child – but you've never w-wanted _me. _The idea of me – yes. But how do I know that this will last? How long do I have to wait before I disappoint you, or you get sick of me again?" Danielle was crying silently now, and she was shaking as she poured out her biggest fears. "For all of these months – I've waited in the wings for you, loving you, wanting nothing more than for you to be proud of me, or at least _notice _me" she choked out. "Every day, I wanted to tell you, wanted to just scream at you, tell you who I really was"

Ronnie could respond only with silence, not even needing to ask why she hadn't told her. She already knew the answer. For all this time, her child had been lurking right underneath her nose, but she had been far too cold and cruel to see it, and had ended up pushing away, the one person who meant everything in the whole world to her. The realisation crashed into her like a tonne of bricks, and she felt dazed all of a sudden. _Danielle_ was really her daughter, her baby girl. And Ronnie had hurt her, so badly..

"But I couldn't" Danielle continued. "I couldn't ever bring myself to tell you, not until tonight" her whispered voice tailed off, and she pulled away from Ronnie's hold. She stood up slowly, and walked over to the window, leaving Ronnie kneeling on the couch, still crying quietly.

She folded her arms tightly across her chest, and peeked out into the street, hyper-aware of Ronnie's presence. She didn't dare to look into her eyes. This was just all so surreal for Danielle. For so many, long, hard months, all she wanted was to be able to tell Ronnie the truth. Now that Ronnie knew, that Danielle was actually _there, _in Ronnie's flat, with Ronnie admitting that she wanted her...it was beyond anything she had every imagined, the good mixed in with the bad.

Suddenly, she jumped as her phone vibrated in her pocket. She pulled it out, and turned back toward Ronnie, who was looking at her questioningly, eyes still brimming with tears. "It's Stacey" she muttered in explanation. "I forgot... Look, Ronnie, I really need to get this"

Ronnie stared at her blankly with that same look of hurt on her face, but nodded lightly.

Danielle dithered for a moment, and then clicked the accept button, raising the phone to her ear.

Stacey's voice started buzzing right away. "Dan! Where the hell are you?!"

"Hey, Stacey, I'm fine" Danielle started weakly, shooting awkward glances at Ronnie. Her mother had looked away from her, and was now staring into space, the tears still dripping down her cheeks. She looked...lost and kind of out of it, like she was in a trance or something.

She clapped the phone tightly to her ear, hearing Stacey's string of words, but not actually listening to them.

"...been doing my nut! You've be gone for ages, Danielle, where are you? What's happened?" Stacey questioned, sensing something was not quite right with her friend.

"Huh? Oh, yeah! Stacey stop worrying, I'll be home soon!" Danielle noticed how Ronnie's head had snapped upward at these words. She turned away slightly and dropped her voice, though it did no good, for Ronnie could still hear every word of the conversation. "Stacey – I'm – I'm at Ronnie's" Danielle said.

There was a second's silence as Stacey absorbed that information. Then she piped up, her incessant stream of questions just the same as before. "Ronnie Mitchell?! Danielle, what the hell?! What are you there for, what's happened?!"

Danielle cut over her. "Stacey!" she hissed. "I can't talk right, now, I'll explain when I come home OK?" she couldn't help but feel irritated by Stacey's attitude, it merely reminded Danielle of all the terrible things Ronnie had said, and how she had acted. She quickly pressed the end call button with grim satisfaction, knowing that Stacey would give her an earful later, but for the moment not caring.

She turned round, and then stopped short, phone still in hand. Ronnie was looking at her, with that doe-like love in her eyes again, soft and gentle. Her tears had stopped.

Danielle dithered. "Uh..." she stuttered over her words, embarrassed to meet Ronnie's eyes again.

Ronnie inhaled deeply, unfolding her legs from where she knelt on the couch, and standing up. She stood awkwardly, nervous. All she wanted was to hold Danielle again. Feel her in her arms, and know that everything was alright.

She took a step toward her daughter, eyes appraising her face. "Is everything OK?" she gestured to the phone which was still in Danielle's hand.

"Um, yeah" Danielle stuttered again, worry painted clearly across her face.

Ronnie took another little step forward, reaching out and touching Danielle's arm. "Danielle – I'm sorry" she whispered.

There she went again. Uttering those two little words, that didn't really mean anything, because they wouldn't and couldn't take all of the hurt away. A little sigh escaped the younger woman, and it was a sound of defeat. The call from Stacey had cleared her head a little, and now, the hurt pierced her more sharply, with the clarity of the realisation hitting her, that telling Ronnie hadn't made everything magically better. She met Ronnie's gaze steadily, determination in her eye. All Ronnie wanted to do was hold her close, and be mother to her, but things could never be as simple as that. Danielle knew that now.

"I know you are" Danielle murmured back, her shoulders slumping. She looked toward the door, her eyes darting between it and Ronnie. "I should go, Ronnie" she mumbled without much conviction. "Stacey's really worried –" she edged a little in the direction of the door.

"Wha – No!" Ronnie interjected almost forcefully, stepping to the side, so that she blocked Danielle's path to the door, a look of pure terror on her face. Her hands still on Danielle's arm, her eyes were filled with anguish and fear. As she saw Danielle react with fear, at her words, she immediately cursed herself, knowing they had been so careless. "I mean...Please, don't go, not yet" she added, much more softly, moving even closer to Danielle.

"Ronnie-" Danielle began, brows knitting together with desperation, her voice sounding strangled, her nerves heightening to even more of an edge. Angry, annoyed Ronnie was one that she was far more used to and terrified of. There was a part of her that was terrified that this Ronnie would make a re-emergence.

Ronnie placed her hand on Danielle's cheek, smoothing her hair out of her eyes. "_Please_" Ronnie whispered, her lip quivering. "I've only just gotten you back. Please stay? I'm sorry – but let me make it right? Let me _try_?"

_So stay with me  
You look in my eyes  
And I'm screaming inside that I'm sorry_

Ronnie stroked Danielle's cheek, eyes searching her daughter's scared and worried features, desperately searching for forgiveness.

Their eyes locked, blue on brown, and a thousand unspoken words passed between them, a hundred different pleas, a longing mirrored by them both.

Danielle felt her breath catch in her throat and she exhaled loudly, blinking rapidly. She nodded wordlessly. "OK" she muttered, and her eyes softened.

Ronnie's face lit up with relief, and she inhaled deeply through her nose, yet another sob bubbling in her throat. She pulled Danielle closer to her, embracing her once more. "Thank-you" she murmured into Danielle's hair, and she didn't know what for.

Danielle gulped, finding herself once more swept up in Ronnie's presence and hold, letting herself get carried away. She desperately clung to her newfound clarity, refusing to let it be extinguished. She breathed evenly and steadily, and after a few seconds, she found herself able to pull away from Ronnie's grip, very gently, but still firm. Ronnie retracted her arms from around Danielle willingly, giving her daughter a smile. She sniffed and wiped her eyes. "What's the matter?" she said.

Danielle blinked a couple of times, revelling in her new found clear headedness. "I have to go, Ronnie" she said softly.

She watched as Ronnie grew fearful again. "Wha – Why?" she asked. "I thought that y-you said –"

Danielle caught both of Ronnie's hands. "I did – and I meant it – I still do!" she widened her eyes, still scared of Ronnie's reaction. It made her jumpy, the way Ronnie could change at the drop of a hat. "But – It's late and Stacey's worried..." her voice tailed off and she looked at Ronnie appealingly.

"Oh" Ronnie said, calming down and feeling a little hurt. Could Danielle not wait to see the back of her? She had thought they had been making progress, why was her baby leaving?

"Can't you phone her?" she pleaded softly. She looked down at Danielle's hands which were clutching at her own. "I don't want you to leave"

Danielle faltered at Ronnie's heartfelt admission, which made her feel all warm inside. "I don't want to leave either" the words had slipped from her mouth before she had even realised she had spoken them. But she continued quickly, "But – us, it's all a bit...fast don't you think?" she was unsure. There was a part of her - the part that didn't have any sense of reason or practicality, the part of Danielle that still existed from before her time on the square – that wanted to just stay with Ronnie forever, to be held close by her mother and let everything and everyone else go to pot. But there was also another part of her, a bigger, more dominant part that was tougher and more wary, that was telling her she should take things slow, and go home to Stacey. This second part of her was most like the person she had become and the one she listened to.

Ronnie bit her lip, rubbing the back of Danielle's hand with her thumb. She wanted to say that she didn't think it was too fast at all, but she didn't utter the words aloud. She looked into Danielle's eyes. What Ronnie wanted was Danielle, her little girl. She wanted to hold her close, to tell her that she loved her, and learn every single detail about the child that she thought was dead. This was all so surreal, so weird, so sudden... She was being swept up in all the emotion, and she couldn't really care less about anything else. But looking into Danielle's face, which was still creased with wariness and worry, she decided that maybe she had rushed things. She had hurt Danielle very badly – and pushed her quite a bit that night, as had already happened – so maybe it was time to let Danielle steer things. After all, if Danielle was going to give her a chance, it would have to be on Danielle's terms.

Ronnie nodded her head very slowly. "If it's what you want... we can take things slow. I know that I – I probably don't deserve even the smallest chance" her voice grew tiny "So we can do whatever you want. But I just – _I _want you to stay. But only if that's what _you _want"

Danielle sighed, and gave a wry little smile, bemused and still a little frightened by this strange creature that claimed to be Ronnie Mitchell. "Thanks" she whispered.

There was a silence that lingered for a moment or two, and Ronnie held her breath, praying that the moment would never end. Then Danielle looked away, and pulled her hands from Ronnie's hold.

"I better go" she muttered shyly. She moved away from Ronnie and stepped toward the door.

"Wait!" Ronnie said suddenly.

Danielle swivelled on her heel, eyebrows raised questioningly.

"I'll walk you" Ronnie said, unable to bear being apart from Danielle for longer than she needed to be.

"Oh, really that's ok –" Danielle started but Ronnie interrupted her.

"Danielle – it's late and who knows? Paul and that guy might still be hanging around. So...I'll walk you" Ronnie said simply, unwilling to take no for an answer. She was reaching for her coat as she spoke and scrutinised her expression as she mentioned Paul's name. Danielle had flinched a little and paled, before nodding in agreement.

Ronnie narrowed her eyes. She took a step toward her daughter and pressed one finger under Danielle's chin. "Danielle...he didn't hurt you, did he?" her tone was soft and her eyes flickered to Danielle's wrist, where the very first signs of some bruising where beginning to appear, the place where Aidan had gripped her wrist.

Danielle shook her head. "No" she answered, though her words weren't necessarily true. Paul had impregnated her and been a complete bastard toward her, but had never hurt her physically, in that sense, at least.

Ronnie let her hand drop away, noticing the tiniest flicker of something not quite right in Danielle's eyes, but she decided to let it slide. "OK" she muttered, not entirely convinced.

She looked at Danielle's skimpy little outfit, suddenly struck by the fact that it was freezing outside and her daughter had no jacket. She hurried out of the room, re-emerging with one of her coats that looked like it would fit Danielle. "Here" she said, offering the jacket out to Danielle.

"Oh, Ronnie, it's OK" Danielle muttered bashfully, but reached out and slipped her arms into the cute little black coat all the same. "Thanks" she said. She paused, looking at Ronnie, suddenly not wanting to leave.

Ronnie smiled at her. "It suits you, that" she nodded toward the coat, which was only slightly long in the sleeves for Danielle.

Danielle sighed and returned the smile. "Shall we go, then?"

Ronnie nodded, taking a deep breath. "OK, if that's what you really want." She stepped forward and linked her hand through Danielle's, squeezing it tightly. She led her out of the living room, out of the front door, and they stepped out into the night together.

Locking the door behind her, Ronnie turned and gave Danielle a rueful smile, wishing that Danielle would stay the night with her. "Let's go" she said.

**OK so the next chapter will follow on directly from this, and I think it'll be the last one. I am considering a sequel to this fic, due to the delightful response I've received. Would anyone be interested? Let me know :D **

**xxx**


	9. Chapter 9

**Hey! So here goes the last chapter :) Would just like to say thank-you for the response I've gotten for this fic, it means a lot :D**

_And you forgive me again  
You're my one true friend  
And I never meant to hurt you_

The night air was bitingly cold as the two woman walked down the street. Ronnie held Danielle's hand very tightly in her own, as she walked slowly, never wanting to have to let go. She kept shooting little glances sideways at Danielle, still bowled over by the fact that this was her little girl. The whole situation was so surreal, just hours ago she had been sitting crying over her little baby Amy, the child who had died. Yet here her baby was, living, breathing, walking down the street, hand in hand with her.

The sound of their footsteps filled the quiet night, as they walked toward the Slater's house. Ronnie felt her chest tighten as they drew close to the swings, the very place where her life had been turned upside down, and in one instant, the world wasn't the same place anymore. Where when you think that you know something, but then you uncover something else, something shocking, which throws the whole picture.

"It's crazy, this" Ronnie murmured.

Danielle looked at Ronnie nervously, but was soothed by the little smile she wore. "What is?" she asked softly.

Ronnie came to a stop beside the fence of the playground. "Just a couple of hours ago – we were right there" she pointed to the swings. "I was – well" she raised her eyebrows. "And yet now..." she smiled, and her voice became thick. She looked at Danielle, tears clouding her eyes, smiling through the tears. "Now I've got everything that I've ever wanted"

Danielle bit her lip, gulping under the intensity of Ronnie's loving gaze. She couldn't think of any words to say. Instead, she just squeezed her hand tightly, hoping that Ronnie would know what she meant. She smiled a little, and hunched her shoulders, the soft fabric of Ronnie's coat brushing against her skin. She inhaled sharply, the smell of Ronnie's perfume filling her nostrils. This in itself was enough to make her head spin. Ronnie, who was such a private unreachable person, giving out her possessions? And Danielle knew that this wasn't some old jacket that she rarely used, she had in fact seen Ronnie wear it many times. It felt so weird to feel the same jacket hugging her body.

They stood for a moment, not speaking, Ronnie still staring at Danielle with the same tear-blurred gaze. She blinked at her, taking in every little detail. She noted the way that Danielle's hair always seemed to curtain her face when she bent her head forward bashfully. She fidgeted, her eyes wide and wary as she shot Ronnie odd little glances. Her eyelashes were still spiked with tears.

Ronnie gave a sigh, and squeezed Danielle's hand. "Come on" she said softly, gently tugging on her daughter's arm.

Danielle went obligingly, still gripping onto Ronnie's hand like a child. Their soft footsteps filled the night air around them, filling up the space of the silence which loomed in between them, with thousand unspoken words on both their lips.

There was much that Danielle wanted to know. That she _needed _to know. But the task felt so enormous, so huge...she just didn't know where to start. She exhaled slowly, her breath misting in the cold night. She shivered involuntarily as they passed the community centre and ended back in the middle of the square.

They both slowed their pace, and Danielle looked across to the Slater's, where all the downstairs lights where still blazing. She dbshoved her free hand in the pocket of the jacket and sighed.

Ronnie stopped, turning toward Danielle. "What's wrong?"

"That" she shook her head slightly, nodding toward the Slater's.

"Oh" Ronnie murmured. "Well, you know you don't have to go back, if you don't want to" she began quietly, her forehead creasing with worry. She thought back to how fragile Danielle had seemed in the flat, the last thing Ronnie wanted now was her to go back and have to face the Slater's shouting at her.

For a moment, Danielle hesitated. Then she sighed again. "No, it'll better if I get this over with" she nodded, trying to convince herself.

Ronnie's face fell. "OK" she smiled, disappointed, and started walking slowly again, still gripping Danielle's hand tightly. There was so much that she wanted to say...

With every step that they took, it was a second closer to when Danielle would go inside, and Ronnie felt her heart flutter with panic. This was her Amy, her baby, and all she wanted to do was to hold her and never let her go. She unintentionally squeezed Danielle's hand tighter.

As they walked through the square, past Arthur's bench, time was passing too fast for Ronnie's liking. She couldn't believe it, everything was just a crazy blur, and before she knew it, they were only feet away from the Slater's.

Danielle came to a stop a couple of feet away from the gate and she looked at Ronnie warily. "Well..." she began awkwardly, when Ronnie made no attempt to loosen her grip on her hand. "I had better get in there, you know what Stacey's like..." she gave a tiny shrill titter, and flexed her fingers.

Ronnie, who had been staring up at the house with an odd look on her face, now snapped her eyes to Danielle's face.

"Wait a minute" she said, moving so she was directly in front of Danielle. She reached out, taking both of Danielle's hands with her own. She licked her lips as she stared into Danielle's eyes, her mouth drying. "I just..."

Danielle faltered, watching Ronnie, her eyes round with surprise. She still felt wary, every sudden movement or change that Ronnie made – it was just unsettling after so long of expecting abuse and rejection.

Ronnie sucked in a deep breath sharply, reading the hesitation in Danielle's eyes, the thought of her daughter being scared of her wounding her deeply. It was like a knife that drove itself deep inside her heart. She wanted her baby, wanted to love and protect her – not be the one causing her fear.

Tears pricked at her eyes, and she released Danielle's hands, moving them instead to cup both sides of her face. "I just want you to know – I love you. And I'm so sorry" she shook her head as the tears spilled over. "I'll do everything I can to make this right – if you'll let me" she pleaded, never wanting the moment to end.

Danielle widened her eyes even further, feeling tears once again signal their arrival. Ronnie's hands were warm and gentle as they held her face, and her crystal clear blue eyes were burning with love. It stunned her, to see how different Ronnie was being.

She opened her mouth wordlessly, failing to come with any sort of appropriate response. But it was like she couldn't get her brain into gear, Ronnie's touch and presence turning her to mush.

"Please, Danielle" Ronnie pleaded, spilling yet more tears, mistaking Danielle's silence for something else. "Can you forgive me?" she uttered the words in a hushed whisper.

Danielle inhaled sharply.

In the next moment, Ronnie became of nothing else, other than the feeling of Danielle's arms round her neck. She staggered in shock, as Danielle buried her face deep into the crook of her neck, and her arms clung tightly to Ronnie's neck.

Ronnie let out a gasp of relief and held Danielle close, but it was all over in a matter of seconds. As soon as Danielle came to her senses again, she stepped back, breaking the hold. She smiled warily, but her eyes were filled with a warmth.

Ronnie nodded and sniffed, and no words were needed. Perhaps they were a little too difficult to utter at the moment. Whatever the reason, she was grateful to be given the chance to make things better.

Danielle stepped back, and laughed a little, wiping her eyes. "What am I like" she muttered, shaking her head.

Ronnie laughed too, the tears still streaking their way down her own face. Danielle took a deep breath, and started to shrug off the coat.

"No, no – you keep it" Ronnie said. "I don't want you to be cold...and it _does_ suit you"

Danielle hesitated. "Are you sure?"

"Positive"

"Well...I suppose I could give it back to you tomorrow" she hedged.

"Tomorrow?" echoed Ronnie, surprised.

Danielle looked up. "Yeah...I'll see you, won't I?" she asked, a little fearfully.

Ronnie grinned widely. "Of course" she nodded. "I'll call you? Or you call me, whatever" she rushed, feeling tongue-tied.

Danielle smiled and raised her eyebrows at Ronnie's inadvertent clumsiness. It wasn't like her at all. "I'd like that" she whispered.

The pair fell silent for a moment, and shared a look that seemed to stretch on indefinitely. As if by just standing there, they could freeze this moment forever, and exist only inside it.

Danielle's eyes flickered to the house. "I have to go" she sighed in defeat.

Ronnie slowly released her daughter's hand, as soon as Danielle's grasp was freed from hers, her arm fell limply to her side.

Danielle smiled shyly.

"I'll see you tomorrow?" Ronnie asked, as Danielle began to turn away. Her daughter nodded. "OK. I love you!" she called, watching as Danielle walked up to the Slater's door. She paused with her hand against the wood, and twisted her head backwards. She gave a tiny little nod and grinned.

Ronnie smiled back, her heart swelling with love, and she watched until Danielle had closed the door behind her. She stood watching the place where her daughter had stood for several moments, afraid to blink, just in case it was all a dream.

Then she sighed, and tucked both hands inside her pockets. With one last look longing, directed toward the Slater's house, she turned on her heel and began to walk back the way she came. She couldn't stop from smiling, even if the tears did still streak their way down her face. For the first time in a long while, she felt complete.

**OK, so I'd thought I'd leave it here :) I hope you enjoyed this, and I can tell you that I will do a sequel, since you're all so enthusiastic about the idea lol :P I'm not sure when I'll start it, because I've got exams coming up, and in the meantime I'm really going to try and move 'Broken' along :D  
But watch out for it :D  
Anyway, thank-you so much for all your kind reviews and support, they mean such a lot to me :D **

**Kirsty  
xxx**


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